Chairman Pip's Railway Thoughts

We told you it would happen

Posted in Business, Commuter, Customer service, Europe, Great Britain, High Speed, Media by Chairman Pip on 28 October 2011

Building a tunnel under the Channel, you were bound to get people wanting to use it. And now look, all these Frenchies coming over and stealing our jobs. I don’t know; they could invade by force so they’ll invade by stealth. Pretty soon we’ll all be eating garlic sausage and onion soup and wearing berets. It’s the end!!!

Of course, that is the jist of yet another article to emanate forth from the printing house of the Daily Express. Today’s headline is:

French told “all aboard the jobs train to Britain”

This tells of a plot by the French to send hordes of their unemployed to Britain on state subsidised train services through the Tunnel to steal jobs from Brits. And I’m not joking about it being called a “plot”:

A French plot to send hordes of unemployed workers to snatch our jobs sparked outrage last night. Authorities in France are masterminding a scheme that could see more than 1,000 jobless “exported” to the UK on cut-price tickets from the French unemployment capital, Calais. Plans are being hatched to run French low-cost trains through the Channel Tunnel which would allow them to work here by day and return home at night.

Now I may be completely behind the times, but as far as I was aware Britain had still not signed up to the Schengen Agreement, which is why Eurostar still have to use physically separate platforms from the domestic services sharing the stations they operate from (and which presumably Deutsche Bahn will also have to provide when they start running trains to London). So, in order to use an international train, you’d still need to take your passport with you, and still need to go through all of the rigmerole of international checkin (which, although less arduous than flying, is still a lot longer than travelling on domestic trains). While the idea of commuting between London, Kent, Nord Pas-de-Calais and Lille (not to mention the potential of Paris and Brussels) is a good one, as it could well expand the employment market on both sides of the Channel, getting to the stage where we have a regular “Transmanche Metro” will be a drawn out process. Furthermore, there is the potential for a British plot to go over there and take their jobs. Have they considered that? Of course not. Because we’re British and we’re honourable.

“French told ‘All Aboard the Jobs Train to Britain'”


2 Responses

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  1. Alan (28481k) said, on 28 October 2011 at 3:30 pm

    Nah, it’s more like “We’re British so we’re unemployable over there…”

  2. Colin McLeod said, on 31 October 2011 at 7:45 am

    Vive la France

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